Did I blog anything on this day a year ago?
I didn't want to browse through to find out cos I will tend to feel even more emotional if I do so.
If everything had been smooth and I hadn't taken the initiative to drop him an email, seeing that he was unhappy about tying the knot with me, and that if he had behaved like a man, things may have turn our differently and we may have tied the knot and today, we may be celebrating our 1st year wedding anniversary.
I wonder if he have any impression of it and if he remember anything special about this date :(
Nowadays when any of our common friends or my friends were to ask him about such thing, he would definitely reply "soon soon..." I really doubt this "soon soon..." though I also hoped that he will really keep to his words.
Everything should have a deadline and I am sure the deadline of 30-years old is more than sufficient... ...
Will I always remember this date? If I don't want to let go, I will never be happy. I know it clear.
I may have been too sensitive but I could feel that he is still not serious about settling down with me. I hope I am wrong. I happened to browse thru a conversation I kept between him and his china room mate, sue -- the one which sue expressed her interests in him. When Sue prompted him if he is sure to settle down with me and marry me, he replied "nobody knows what will happen in the future." This definitely gives sue the impression that he is still sourcing for one and I am definitely not suitable enuff for him :( How sad.
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